Pain

“If we're growing, we're always going to be out of our comfort zone.” John Maxwell

                This week I’m going to talk about pain. Yeah, pain comes in different forms. I’m use to the physical form of pain and this year I’ve been exposed to the other form of it, mental pain. Throughout our lives, we begin to make decisions based on prior experiences and create our own reality based on those earlier experiences. The experiences that affect us the most are the painful ones. The easiest way to deal with these pains are to act like they never happened and shield yourself from things that remind you of them and all future ways to get hurt the same way again. The problem is that isn’t the most effective way and you will never get rid of them that way. All you will be doing is reinforcing a vicious cycle of hate and fear. The cycle becomes a spiral and now you have your world and this is really hard to change. You’ve emerged with a new paradigm.  In essence, you’ve created your own world, your own reality that is based on past experiences and you’ve let that control the entire future of your life (sometimes only in a specific area). 

                Most of all the good things we’ve got have come through risks. Unfortunately, a lot of bad things that have come to us have also been through risks. Now this is a problem and most people will begin to take less and less risks as time goes by as a result of their previous pain. The problem with this is that you end up reducing your quality of life. The best plan would be to find ways to take risks properly. Learn from the last and try even harder next time. Because chances are, whatever risk you did take was for a reason, you wanted something out of it and it didn’t work out the way planned. Granted, there are some risks that aren’t worth it, but very few, because we usually take risks (big ones) that are. Emotions aren’t bad, but they are when we don’t understand them. 

                Get strong and live stronger. We can’t erase our pain. The best thing we can do is not let it manifest fear and control our lives. We can make our lives so much better that we can overcome that pain and instead of running away from it. We can show ourselves what we’re capable of and not let our lives be dictated by something negative. We have to continue to look for the positive and make that a habit. Any habit is hard to break. So if we’re stuck in a habit of negative thinking, then we MUST do the best we can to break it. That comes by constantly being around, people, things, places, and anything that makes us happy. Once we begin to feel happy, we begin to feel confident, we begin to feel good about ourselves with clear minds to pursue more happiness and before you know it, the world will be a better place. Now we are positive and that becomes a habit. The only way that habit will break is consistent negativity, but that’s where we stay strong and remember that it’s only a habit and we CAN change it.

                We’ll be able to deal with pain better as we go along. I’ve mentioned this in one of my old blogs and I’ll mention it again here. We cannot control our emotions; we can only control our actions as a result of them. You cannot choose to be happy or sad, you can only choose to take action to stay that way or get out of that way. Practice positivity by practicing whatever makes you happy and take risk towards whatever you feel will make you happier, no boundaries! Feeling the same pain as someone else is the only way to truly understand another. With that said,.I’ve learned a lot over the past few months and I’m happy I had those experiences because I can now improve the quality of my life and the relationships I have in it. Since we’re on this topic, I would love to use this opportunity to thank everyone in my life the close ones and the ones I have just crossed paths with.

We are nothing.........only us, only me, only you, only them

 "Take no thought of who is right or wrong or who is better than. Be not for or against."
Bruce Lee

Religion, health, sports, culture, games, fashion, language, etc.  We all hold onto our ideals very dearly. Of course, we live by them and we are dedicated to continue living by them because they are a map, an idea of a clear cut goal or prize to live our lives comfortably. Or at least that’s a habit we get into. With this entry, I’ll stem back to the idea of the earlier posting regarding habits and habit forming.  

At a young age, we all pick up habits and hone them over the years. This is a good skill to have and will help us greatly in the future, but there is a chance we will develop bad habits. The only thing to get us back on track is to recognize those bad habits and step out of our comfort zone to break them and form better ones.  A major reason that always hold people back is feeling lost, confused, and wrong.  People usually tend to become defensive and begin to defend their ideals, their morals, their way of life in whatever area it must be. This isn’t a natural state in human behavior.  In fact, there is NO natural state in human behavior.  Everything is picked up from our environment one way or anything.  With that said, now there’s a possibility for solution.  If we developed these habits and picked them up through our environment, let’s see if we can manually influence them. 

Your identity isn’t you, you are free from everything. Don’t ignorantly let an idea or sub culture define you. You’ll end up defending it for the sake of your own insecurities, with a complete disregard for logic.  Let me make this clear.  Whether it is defending a moral belief or a scientific belief, progress cannot be made unless we recognize there is no right or wrong in this world. In science, there is valid and invalid based on probability and consistent data. This data can never be right or wrong either. It has to constantly be put to the test and at the end of the day, it can only be “accurate”.  If we being to let an idea, culture, religion, or any of the likes ever blindly dictate our way of life, then we have fell victim to one of the worst habits of ignorance ever.  We grew attached to these ideas and have now become dependent on them. We cannot grow unless the idea that we have attached ourselves to grows. 

The worse part of this all is that people will go through great lengths to get their point across ONLY for self validation and those great lengths are limitless, not excluding violence.  Once we begin to hold on to ANY idea with come disregards and disrespect to science and the world around us, we begin to become detached from the world and all of the people. This self-separation is very destructive in the long run. The Earth is a whole organism.  How can an organism be in conflict with itself? How can an organism not understand and truly feel itself? We must be humble and understanding to the world around us. Flexibility will get us far.


This weeks challenge: If you drive. Stop at a light in a busy intersection for three light cycles. Lets see how you can handle the pressure of others........Good luck out there!! :)